Can you even hear me? At his point I’m tired of speaking to you. Thinking of you is like pressing a knife deeper and deeper into my skin. Is this how you felt with your partners? Always defending your body. Always defending your truth?
Fuck.
I am like you. I am my father's daughter.
“So you two fucked?” Kellan was always so brazen. So deadpan and to the point.
It wasn’t like the way he said it, I promise.
He says it like Honor and I aren’t in love. He says it like we’re two adults trying to ruin the lives around us.
We’re not.
“It wasn’t like that. Don’t...don’t say it like that,” What was I doing? Trying to prove I wasn’t in love?
He chuckled underneath his breath for a little. “You told me it wouldn’t get to that, eh? You said that you didn’t have it in you.”
I scoff for no reason. I sound stupid, like a bad action written in to a script. “We’re not together.”
“Your not together?”
“No!”
“Yeah? Then why are you fucking around? Huh? You said no fucking around.” I’m getting angry. My face is red.
I hate to think this way, forgive me, but it's not my fault he never moved on. It’s not my fault he never grew. And it’s most definitely not my fault that never comforted me.
“I wouldn’t let you touch an inch of me,” I murmur lowly. He doesn’t hear me. But he understands I say something insulting.
“ Fucking fuck,” he says rudely and stands to his feet. “ Well, I guess from this point on you’ve established an open relationship.”
I want to throw something at him. I want to grab the lamp and toss it at his face. But he leaves before I can actually regret it.