Her siblings are trying. They say something in English so that he can at least be a part of the conversation. A very dead conversation.
“He’s quiet,” Sephora says in Swedish to Daisy. Daisy nods, then passes him the pepper.
“Wouldn’t you be with a random family on Christmas?”
Ashley blinks down at her plate, stuffing a full spoon of potatoes in her mouth. She feigns like she cannot hear them the entire dinner. Yet, they still talk. There words are like knives, jabbing at her side and provoking her snap. The abuse in the family is not just produced by their father, no. They’d try to place the blame on him, eventually. And at the end of the day, she understands what they can become, even what she can become, if she continues to be around them.
------
Her small feet press against the wood floors as meekly as possible. She can hear his voice, whispering something. Her fingers touch the door lightly, smoothing across the polished finish. She gives the door a subtle push and there he is, sitting on the edge of the couch with his cell pressed at his ear, and his palms cupping his forehead.
“I’m sorry,” she says, before he can fully breathe her in. Before his eyes can touch her own.
“Can I call you back?” he whispers in the phone. She doubts the person hears. He clicks it off anyway, perhaps too afraid to even stand, now that the door is wide open behind her, Kellan begins to shake his head. “You can’t be in here,”
She reaches behind her, placing her weight on the entrance to the room. And when it finally shuts, she lets out a long sigh, even with the cool air that seeps in beneath it. Ashley steps towards him.
His hand reaches for her to stop. To think about it.
There was nothing to think about really. Just the fact that her family is made up of a bunch of assholes and she wants to get back at them. She wants to wake up beside him. She wants to walk out of this room in the morning, and have all of them stare at her like they used to when they were younger.
She stands over him. Her hands reaching for his curls. “Don’t be afraid.”
He glances up at her, already falling for Ashley again. “Promise me something?” Kellan says, then crumples his nose.
“What?”
She felt his warm touch clasp her thigh slowly, “Don’t ever let me look at you they way your father looks at her,” Ashley opened her mouth, then closed it. “Okay?” She answers with a nod, as he massages that spot, staring her right in the eyes.
“You can’t stay the night,” he assures. His hands float higher. “Just for a few more minutes,”
“How could you tell I wanted to?”
“The potatoes,” she grins, practically falling into his lips.
She feels like she was in his arms for the entire night, although all they did was kiss against the wall for a few minutes. Kellan avoided the bed like a plague. He kept to one side of the space, as silent as possible. His hands ran though her hair, his lips roam to kiss every piece of skin her body had to offer. He was as soundless as one would be when the struggle to get a private moment with your partner for the past week and a half, despite the wondering eyes of their controlling father.
There are slip ups. Like the continuous thumps against the wall. And the occasional moan. But when he hears a short bell ring from down stairs, he brings his arm between them to stare at his watch. “He’s coming to bid everyone goodnight,”
Ashley leans in to give him a short, but very intense kiss, pulling his bottom lip down in the process. “Good night,” she whispers near his ear. Kellan shuts his eyes. “I’ll see you in the morning.”